Mask of Iron
by StarksViolet
Summary: Series of one shots: Pepper's point of view on Tony and the world throughout Iron Man 1&2 and The Avengers...will grow with love!
1. Chapter 1

**So this is the begining of a series of one-shots from Pepper's view...I will attempt to explore her feelings and emotions throughout the two Iron Man movies and The Avengers, hope you enjoy!**

The dark curtains which were drawn over Tony's eyes terrified her, she tried to look deeper to see past the wall he'd put up.

The smile which was plastered across his face was a haunting remnant of his former self; she saw the familiarity, if only a whisper, but it still wasn't him.

She watched on as he greeted and mingled, and laughed and talked, no one knew or saw the darkness which was lurking just beneath the surface_. _But she did. She saw it every night: _when the lights are dim and the house is silent, and when the only sound is of her fingers typing away, the silence is broken by his screams as they echo throughout the house. Every night she runs to his room, but stops short at the door. Her hand hovers above the handle, every fibre in her body battling, deliberating. She always decides against it, the cries continue, and despite the sorrow which pulses through her veins she turns and walks away._

She turns back to the businessmen who stand before her, pretending she hadn't noticed Tony by the bar, but from the corner of her eye she sees him make his way across the floor. Her heart skips several beats, and her mind races thinking of what to say. Without hesitation he pulls her into his arms and leads her to the dance floor.

Pepper breathes in every scent, every aroma. Her senses run wild. She hears herself mumble nonsensical phrases which make Tony laugh. His eyes bore into hers; she feels every hair on her body and every vein within. He smiles at whatever she's saying; she can't concentrate on words when he is standing so close to her, holding her. For the first time since coming back from captivity his eyes are full of warmth. She feels his breath on her neck, his hands on her body.

A nervous sigh escapes her lips; he pulls back and looks at her. She can barely contain her emotions; he notices and leads her out for some air.

The night sky is peaceful and Pepper feels at ease. She and Tony talk about anything and everything, his eyes and his words finally match up, she sees the sadness in his eyes and hears it in his voice. The mask he became so good at wearing was falling away, he was allowing himself to be bare with her.

He told her about the cave, the other man who was with him and about the men who tortured him and beat him until he agreed to make their weapons. She listened as he told her about the pain he suffered, the fear and uncertainty, and then he told her that her voice saved him and kept him alive.

Pepper felt her eyes well up with tears as she looked into his. A few moments of silence lingered between them, an unyielding force pulled them together, a desire to hold him, and breathe him in consumed her. He leaned in to her, she heard her heart reverberate throughout her body she had barely noticed that she had stopped breathing. As quickly as the moment had come, it was gone. She opened her eyes and noticed he was looking away from her; he quickly apologised and offered to get her a drink. She felt herself nodding mindlessly.

Left alone, standing on the balcony she looked out at the sky and the city before her. She cursed herself; she would never admit it to herself, let alone anyone else, she loved Tony more than words could express, and she loved more than anything that he confided in her, but it terrified her because Tony was a free spirit and she never wanted him to feel caged because of her, so she would never pursue her feelings, she would never tell him she loves him, because she cares too much.

**I have always found it fascinating, as a writer, what character's are feeling, the subtext which is never truly explored, let me know how you find this type of thing, as I would love to add more should people like it :)**


	2. Omelettes and Clouds

**So with this piece I tried to do a first person POV, it's not something I usually write, so I'm not sure how well I've done, also I've had more than three weeks of not writing a single thing due to personal issues and lack of motivation! **

**So I hope that this was kind of good, at least LOL...still working on the continuation of The Avenged for those of you who are following that piece :)**

I sat with my hands folded in my lap, a few moment of silence between the nonstop calls from lawyers, reporters, shareholders, whoever had something to lose or gain by Tony's erratic actions in Monaco.

The early morning sun shone through the window, I welcomed the warmth on my face. Tony's personal jet was one of luxury and comfort, today it was cold. I felt uneasy and I couldn't shake the feeling. Tony was known for his spontaneity and rash actions, but the events which took place, not twenty four hours ago, were something different. I couldn't quite place it, or work it out. He gave no notice or warning.

Tony left me sitting alone, more than three hours ago, I didn't ask where he was going or what he was doing, I was upset and frustrated; hundreds of calls were coming through demanding answers. I should have probably tried to be a bit more understanding but I didn't have the time, I saw the look on his face when he got up. A sad smile was all he offered, I felt horrible.

I grew tired of the silence and the guilty thoughts in my head, I turned the TV on, a news report about Monaco, of course it was. I heard myself sigh loudly.

Senator Stern rambled on and on about the dangers of the Iron Man technology and how Tony Stark should be held responsible for the 'incident'. I rolled my eyes and turned away. The clouds littered the sky and the hum of the jet made me drowsy, I leaned against the head rest and focussed my attention on the screen. He made me sick; the arrogant smirk on his face did his already sour features no justice. Had he thought about the positive things Iron Man had done?

'Mute'

I turned slightly; Tony was standing in the doorway, how long had he been there? He sat in the seat opposite me; he placed a plate and cutlery in front of me. He looked up and presented me with the half burnt omelette.

I looked around, I couldn't remember any kitchen staff, he never allowed anyone aboard his personal jets anymore, 'did you just make that?' I asked in disbelief.

He leaned back in his seat, 'yeah, where do you think I've been for the last three hours?'

I looked at him intently, his gaze became withdrawn and he eventually looked away from me. I couldn't shake the feeling of dread, something wasn't right; there were no smartass remarks, no attempts to retaliate, nothing at all. He simply sat there, looking out over the horizon and the abundance of clouds.

I couldn't take it anymore, 'Tony, what are you not telling me?'

He slowly turned to face me, the same sad smile. 'I don't want to go home, at all.' He managed.

I considered the man before me. The desperate look of pleading in his eyes and his fear for going home said infinitely more than he ever could. I saw the internal battle he was having with his mind, what was happening? I couldn't stand the silence, or the vulnerability. It terrified me, I'd never seen Tony like this, I cleared my throat, I said anything I could, anything to break the tension. I told him this wasn't a good time to go away on holidays, or to be away from home, I told him we needed to take care of the situation, he nodded. Something was definitely wrong. I didn't dare ask, he would have told me if he needed to. The rest of the flight home he sat looking out the window, his dark eyes never meeting with mine.

I couldn't stand it, I looked away. Whatever was tormenting him like this was serious, serious enough to completely consume every fibre of his being and leave him fearful and hollow. I pushed away the gut wrenching worry which consumed me and left him in silence.

**Let me know what you think, and also if there are any particular scenes anyone would like to see written in Pepper's view! I love being challeneged, so I'm putting it out there :)**


	3. A portal to another life

**As with many people, I too was annoyed that Pepper didn't answer her phone when he rang her, he needed her and she didn't answer! So I had to give this a go too! I admit, it's pretty crappy as far as the other fics like this go, but hey, see what you think :)**

* * *

Her breath hitched as she watched the breaking news on the screen before her.

_What the hell are you doing Tony?_

Iron Man and the nuclear missile flew through the Manhattan skyline, speeding toward the Tower, _his _tower, her eyes remained glued on the screen, shock and horror, fear and confusion ran through her mind.

_Oh my God Tony, please don't do this!_

The reporter mumbled breathlessly as the camera panned across the horizon showing the catastrophic event as it unfolded.

He flew higher and higher, pushing the missile toward the darkness which gaped through the crystal blue skies.

'_Billionaire Tony Stark's Iron Man…'_

The reporter's voice echoed through Pepper's mind, her thoughts ran through a million scenarios, each one pushed away as a stubborn refusal to believe what was happening.

_You're not going to die, you can't!_

Her mind screamed and screamed, she refused to believe it. She watched on, clinging to the edge of her seat as she watched him disappear through the portal.

'No.' She heard herself breathe.

She watched on in silence as the portal slowly closed, it closed and Tony was gone, he was gone.

Her gaze finally dropped as her tears finally fell, 'no, please no.' She wept for him, for her Tony.

An instinctive reaction, like on autopilot she reached for her phone, reporters, magazine columnists, the press and media, everyone would be trying to contact her, all she wanted to do was shut the world out, the world Tony died to save_._

_No, this can't be happening._

She couldn't believe that the world would go on without him, or that they would go on as normal when her world was gone, it was over, _her_ world was lost in a darkened void, in the empty abyss of space.

She glanced down at the phone which vibrated only once, a simple text message.

One Missed Call…

She reluctantly opened the call log. An agonising moan escaped her lips as an image of Tony Stark smiled up at her, a smile which she would never see again.

An overwhelming sensation washed over her, she felt strong arms holding her up as gentle caresses attempted to soothe her.

'No, no, god no,' she wept into Happy's arms.

His words were lost as she cried openly, not knowing how she would ever survive, not knowing how she could go home to an empty house where she would never hear Tony's voice again. She would never hear his laugh or his music or banter with his robots.

Happy pulled her into him as he caressed her hair to protect her from the cruelness of the world, to protect her, the way Tony would have wanted.

His own eyes watered as he watched the pain in her eyes, his own eyes watered as he mourned the loss of his own friend, he felt the pain for how Rhodey would be feeling. Everything they built in their little world came crashing down in a split second.

'He called and I didn't answer, oh God, Happy, I wasn't there when he needed me.' She cried and cried, everything she feared now danced around her cruelly mocking her.

Happy held her tighter, his own tears met with hers as they sat holding each other on the floor of Tony's jet. _Tony's._

'No, please tell me it's not real.' She pleaded as she looked up into Happy's eyes.

Words failed him and only a muffled sob answered her, shattering any form of hope she potentially held.

The hum of the engines continued on as though nothing was happening down below. The little cocoon of safety which Tony made her promise to stay in was a sickly reminder of him. Everything reminded her of him.

'No, Happy, this can't be real, please tell me it isn't.' She held on to him for dear life, clinging to any form of hope in the lack of words he let out.

Happy silently motioned for the rest of the members on the plane to give them some privacy as he helped her into her seat.

She looked down at the phone in her hand, his smile broke her, she carefully hit dial and waited, there was no answer, of course there wasn't, he dropped her head in her hands.

The TV on the plane suddenly came alive with excited voices.

"_Oh my God, Iron Man has fallen through the portal, the Hulk seems to have caught him, oh my God, there's no movement down there, we've lost contact with our reporters on the ground, we'll keep you posted as soon as we know what is happening."_

Both Pepper and Happy looked at each other as the excited news reporter announced the latest news.

'Tony!' She gasped, 'we need to get there now!'

Happy jumped to his feet and moved to the front of the plane, 'how long until we reach New York?' He called out to the pilot.

'ETA is approximately fifteen minutes.' He announced.

Happy looked back at Pepper, 'nearly there, hang in there.'

Pepper nodded, anxiously waiting to land, waiting to find out, hoping against all hope that she would see Tony. All the lines were down, contact was lost to anyone on the ground, her heart ached at the possibility that she had allowed herself false hope.

It had seemed as though hours had passed since the pilot announced their arrival at Tony's private hangar, she and Happy drove in silence as her throat sat comfortable wedged in her throat. She didn't want to speak for fear of losing grip on reality completely.

Happy pulled up to the tower, Pepper rushed out before the car came to a complete stop, she found herself running to the lobby, debris was merely an obstacle and nothing more.

'Pepper be careful!' Happy yelled after her.

She didn't respond, instead she sped up and took to the stairs which lead up.

As she finally reached the top floor her heart began pounded faster and faster, her breath caught in her throat. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

She keyed in her access code and watched the door open, she gasped at the sight of the many unfamiliar faces standing in their apartment.

One of them looked up to her and quickly came to stand before her, hand outstretched, she recognised him as Captain America, 'Miss Potts, Steve Rogers.'

She shook his hand and glanced over at the rest of them, The Avengers, 'where is he?' she breathed.

He nodded and led her over to their room.

'I saw him fly into the portal, and then he was gone, but they said he _fell _back through the portal, what did they mean?' She felt herself rambling, Steve merely smiled sweetly and allowed her to go on, 'please tell me he's alright.'

'He's fine, a little exhausted but fine.' He said finally as they came to a stop at her and Tony's room.

'Thank you.' Pepper whispered.

Steve returned a smile, 'you don't need to thank me, he saved us all.'

Pepper nodded weakly, she waited for Steve to leave and she finally pushed the door open.

'Tony?' She whispered into the darkened room, she couldn't make out the arc, she couldn't make out the familiar blue glow which should have been there.

_Oh God, how bad is it? How bad must it be if his light is dim and he's not answering-_

'Pep.'

She turned on her heels, could she be dreaming? The sound of his voice was heaven to her.

'Oh my God Tony.' She whispered; everything within her pushed her toward him; he stood with a weak smile on his face and open arms.

'Pepper.' He walked closer to her and heavily dropped his arms around her shoulders.

'Tony, are you ok, hey, hey sit down.' She felt the weight of him against her as she helped him over to their bed, 'lie down, it's ok.'

She wrapped her arms around him as they lay side by side, warm and safe in each other arms. She traced the small cut on his brow, 'I thought I lost you.' She whispered in his ear.

'I'm sorry.' He whispered planting a kiss on her forehead.

'You called, I'm so sorry I didn't answer.' She felt her tears stream down her cheeks.

Tony shook his head, 'don't be, everything's ok now.'

'You needed me and I wasn't there.'

'I would have just cried like a baby, you spared me the embarrassment.' He laughed softly.

She smiled, 'you scared me, you know that right?'

'I know, and I'm sorry Pep, I had to.'

'I know, you are a hero, and you did what you had to, but don't do it again.' She smirked, 'I need you right here with me too you know.'

'I'll always come home to you, I love you Pepper.'

'And I love you too Tony,' she kissed his eyes as they grew heavy, 'get some sleep now, I'll be here when you wake up.'

He nodded silently against the pillow as they lay in each other's embrace, she knew what he went through and the fear was evident in his eyes, he needed her, she knew that. So she would be here, by his side, always and forever.

'I love you Tony.' She whispered against his chest as he finally went to sleep, 'you're my hero.'

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**As before, if anyone has any requests for any scenes they'd like in Pepper's POV, let me know, Lou Blue, I'm still working on that piece you requested (IM2 when Pepper found out that Tony was dying)**

**Love to hear what you think :)**


	4. Three months since they danced

**Another little one shot for the Pepperony lovers, the setting throughout Iron Man, Pepper's thoughts when Tony was gone, I wished we were shown something from her side in the movie, shame they didn't but I guess we can all imagine and write about it instead :)**

* * *

A sudden jolt woke her from the nightmare which had plagued her for the last three months.

Each night was the same; Rhodey's voice and the words which still sounded in her mind as if it were only yesterday.

Only it wasn't yesterday, Tony has been gone for nearly three months now. It would be three months in exactly three days and eight hours. Pepper hasn't lost count, or track. Everything is still vivid in her mind.

She refused to believe that he's gone and that he's not coming back. She refused to let that thought creep into her mind, because if it did, she was afraid it would nest there and settle and bore its way into her being, infecting every fibre in her body.

No, she wouldn't believe he was gone.

Every day is a new challenge, the news of the billionaires disappearance has slowly become less frequent and more and more she felt anger toward the world, how could they go on, simply acting as though the world is unchanged as she sits and weeps, mourning _his _presence.

The world _had_ changed, everything was different now, and it wasn't, an eerie similarity between then and now haunted her every waking moment, and every darkened night.

She wiped the sweat beads from her forehead; every night became a ritual of tears and denial then anger and screaming. Jarvis had offered to console her, she ordered him to remain silent. Every day, for the first month, he told her how significantly lower the probability of Mr Stark coming home was.

Since then she sat in silence, ate in silence and slept in silence, save for the sound of her own screams echoing in her dreams.

A heavy feeling of nausea accompanied the already macabre feeling which surrounded her in an air of heavy angst. She wrapped her arms tightly around her legs. She felt her tears wet the shirt as they fell heavily into the fabric. The faint fragrance of Tony's cologne lingered as a ghostly memory.

No, he wasn't gone, she refused to believe that.

She glanced over at the clock on the bedside table, just after four in the morning. Every night she found herself staring at the digits which glowed blue, not unlike Tony's reactor. The clocked ticked away the minutes of the night; she gave up on the possibility of falling asleep again after the first week.

Instead she sat in the bed in the sweat drenched shirt looking across the room at the dark sky. Was he looking at the same sky? Was he looking up at the bright stars which shone as brightly as he did with brilliance and strength?

The refusal to believe he was gone was the only strand of hope she held on to as she dangled over the precipice of insanity.

Night and day would come and pass, eventually her mind would break and she would no longer have the ability to hold on to him, the sound of his voice, the touch of his hands on her skin, the smell of his cologne or his smile. The proximity in which they found each other at the charity gala was intoxicating, a cruel memory which battered her broken soul.

No, she wouldn't believe he was gone.

A silent night unfolded before her as it did many other nights, but tonight she wandered outside, onto the balcony, the rush of the wind and the roar from the ocean below assaulted her.

She held her breath as the raw power of nature crashed down upon her and around her.

She felt herself falling, down on her knees she found her strength, she clutched the cell phone in her hand, she hoped, still hoped, that he would call her to tell her he was coming home. She hoped because she couldn't give up, she didn't know how.

Hours had passed and the wind settled as the sun began to rise, her eyes focussed on the distant horizon….was he looking at the same beautiful thing? Somewhere, wherever he was, was he seeing the same sky she was?

Her mind jolted back to reality as her phone rang, she glanced down at the caller ID, Rhodey, she swallowed hard and prepared herself for another bout of disappointing news.

It was nearly three months since Tony went missing in Afghanistan, it would be three months in exactly three days and two hours, nearly three months of waiting for Rhodey's phone call to give her the same news over and over again.

'Rhodey.' She said flatly, no enthusiasm would be wasted on a dead end.

Only this time it wasn't Rhodey, this time the voice on the other end breathed her name, the way she breathed _his_.

'Tony?'

Silence enveloped them as they both absorbed the simple, powerful emotion spoken through one word, a breath of each other's names.

Words were not needed between them, the heavy shroud which blanketed her vanished and he was coming home, _he _was alright.

No, she wouldn't believe he was gone, because she was the one who carried the strength for both of them, she was the one who believed he _would_ come home.

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**I Love Pepperony SO SO SO MUCH, and I always get so fangirl when I think about what feelings these two go through :) LOVED the foreheads touching scene in the new IM3 Japanese Trailer, so excited!**


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